Clearly, you’d be upset. You’ve moved on with the relationship gone bad. But the problems it has left you makes you upset. It makes you sad. You’re not affected by the fact that the mother of your kids parties all night while your kids are at home waiting for her. And the circumstances does not allow you to accompany your kids that are home alone. You’re not upset that she parties and is with another guy. You’re upset that she cares more about her happiness than the happiness of your children. You choose not to care because it’s been too long that you cared. And it hurt, it hurt so much that you stopped caring to stop the pain. You’d wish you know this was going to happen so that you could stop it before it could happen. But it has already happened. And you can do nothing about it. Except move on and do what’s best for you and the children.
You’re still hoping that she’d pay more attention to your children. She wants to have custody over them, why is she treating them like that? You deserve to have custody over them but the circumstances are not in your favor again. Because the world works like that. But you’re an adult now. You blame yourself for your shortcomings that this happened. And somehow that makes you feel better, because at least you know you’re at fault. But you also know that it’s not only you that is at fault. You’d wish you could talk to her about the problem but she brushes it off every time you try to. She repeatedly blames you for your shortcomings. As if you’re the only cause of all this mess. Then you realize that there’s very little you can do to fix the situation. And that being apathetic to all of these will make you handle the situation better.
So you just resort to writing it like this. That’d make you feel better. It has already made you feel better. Tomorrow will be a better day.